Where did i come from?
From a place with such beauty that it can conjure nothing but a everlasting thirst for a place ever leaving, ever fleeting.
As the hills become plains; my drunked nights become longer.
My loneliness grows with the brightness of each street light.
Whom do I blame for this painful change?
My own children?
Who now work as salesmen in big markets of big cities.
Leaving behind acres of land that begs to be toiled.
My old arms and fading consciousness is now only enough to boil my rice and let it rot until it becomes alcohol.
My friends, my lovers, my fathers; all lost in the unseen woods still untouched by roads and bridges.
Not as stars i dream of them but as living an eternal life after death; eating fruits and roaming around naked in a jungle, dancing and making love, talking in our mother tongue, listing to folklores of our tribe.
So, i drink my hooch and vomit out my memories; of a place long lost, outside its only dust and smoke.
Where is my jungle?
Where is my brave father?
I need to be protected.
His strong arms; his marks of wars unknown, he smelled of fire and salty sweat.
In his arms i thought this life shall last.
I am hungry, mother.
No food can ever fill my stomach.
Your brisk walk and stern eyes still remind me to be good.
I know, I have disappointed you; I couldn’t live the life you wanted me to, I couldn’t teach my children our way of life.
But; I am a old drunken man now mother, have pity in me.
I will find forgiveness.
I will find you.
In the jungle of eternal life.